its been three weeks here in the US of A. and i wouldn't say the experience is upsetting or unpleasant, but rather, pleasant yet slightly unsettling. way out of my comfort zone, experiencing a vastly different world from the one in which i have been accustomed to.
people say time and tide wait for no man, and halfway round the world, i cannot help but consider, wonder what i may be missing out on, despite that which i have gained while i'm where i am.
don't get me wrong, the place here is so vastly different, with land abundant and beautiful houses, old buildings that are still being used - though probably would have been considered historical monuments in singapore. the weather is beautiful, with little rain and as of recently, bright sunshine with cool temperatures and cool breeze coming straight towards here in the gulf of mexico.
yet as my reliance upon those around me is removed from my near immediate premises, so is my reliance on Him and His faithfulness increased. after all, who else is there to turn to? i mean that not in a bitter nor sad way, but merely as a matter of fact.
perhaps this could be considered a period of testing, for i had forgotten the feeling of being so far removed from the friends whom i have come to treasure and the company i so enjoy. alongside the communal anointing of a church gathered before Daddy God, and the anointing of freedom, of grace that i had become so used to.
and perhaps i had become numb to that which had so freely been given, and in time, taken for granted - oh, typical, one might say, but here, i truly miss that corporate anointing which had always been present in our gatherings.
and having been in such an amazing presence of grace and love multiple times, and after less than a month, feeling its seperation, i seem to recall the time when none of this had been present in my life, and wonder now, as i did then, how much meaning life had truly seemed to hold for me then.
that time is distant, yet seemingly not far away in my recollection.
but i would that the memory of the past not rob the beauty of the present, rahter amplifying it in its contrast.
